


What's Past Is Prologue

by to_be_d3termined



Category: Stranger Things (TV 2016)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Post-Stranger Things 3, Reader-Insert, self aware reader
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-11
Updated: 2020-12-11
Packaged: 2021-03-10 23:21:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,402
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28005321
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/to_be_d3termined/pseuds/to_be_d3termined
Summary: The reader is having trouble adjusting to this new world… which they thought was fictional. They’re also having trouble dealing with their feelings for Steve, who is apparently real.
Relationships: Steve Harrington/Reader, Steve Harrington/You
Kudos: 16





	What's Past Is Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> The plot that I used for this could be developed into a much larger fic, but really I just used it for the angst. Forewarning: I’m a comma fiend and there are a lot of hyphens and ellipses sometimes, so sorry they seem overused. This is technically my first fic, so sorry if it sucks. Also, I had originally planned for this to be super short, so, in this, Eleven and the Byers are in Hawkins. Just take whatever you want from that. Maybe they’re visiting. Maybe they heard the news that someone from an alternate universe was there, so they came by. Maybe this is before they moved. Or maybe, they never moved. It’s really up to you. I didn’t address it in the fic. Anyway, I hope you like it!

You could hear the wind whistling through the trees, trying to fight its way underneath your jacket. The sun would start setting soon, leaving only the light from the pool and the house, and the cold would begin to take over . It was another ‘meeting’ (not that there had been that many), this time at Steve’s house. Everyone was there. The party, Joyce, Jonathan and Nancy, Robin, and, of course, Steve. 

Ever since arriving in this unknown world, which is still somehow familiar, you had been getting worked up, overwhelmed, nervous, pretty much any emotion that was negative. You tried not to show it too much around everyone, not wanting to worry people who were pretty much in a constant state of worry, but after so long, it was building up and becoming harder to hold back. You didn’t know if staying with Steve was helping or making things worse, you thought it might be both. 

Steve was one of the first people you saw when you got here, and he was your favorite character, so of course you felt somewhat comfortable with him. After finding everyone and telling them your story, you needed a place to stay, so Steve offered up his home. His parents were almost never home, and despite not knowing you for that long, you two had gotten along, and he technically knew you better than the others. Of course, you said yes, for these reasons. . . and others.

Look, you knew that Steve Harrington was a fictional character, you did, but that didn’t stop you from liking him as much as you did. In your world, you had people you cared about and who cared about you. But you didn’t have that one person who provided you unconditional love and care. Who provided you a safe space and a moment of peace in the ever-present storm that felt like your life. You didn’t have that one person who was your everything and you were theirs. But, you had Steve. 

After watching that show over and over and over again, he grew on you. You needed that person, even if they weren’t real, and Steve seemed like the perfect candidate. You felt a little hesitant to call it love, seeing as how Steve was fictional, but you came to really care about him.You began to rely on Steve Harrington, even if it was just the idea of him. When you were sad, or scared, or you couldn’t fall asleep, Steve was the answer. He was always the answer. And then one day you found yourself. . . here. Almost everything you’ve ever wanted falls right into your lap.

At first, you had brushed your own feelings off. Sure, you had a crush on Steve Harrington, your favorite character in your favorite show, but now this is a real person you're talking about, there is no way that it’s the same thing. You were wrong. Having someone who you relied on and thought about almost all the time, who you also thought was purely fictional right in front of you, just makes those feelings that you had intensify. 

So not only did you have to deal with the dreadful feelings that came with being in a fictional world in an alternate universe of some sort, but you also had to deal with the feelings that came with living with a fictional character who is no longer fictional, who you also had feelings for. Yikes!

So of course, you were pretty worked up. You didn’t know why you were here, you didn’t know how to leave, you didn't know what you were doing, and you had been staying with someone whom you were infatuated with, despite the fact that before a little while ago, they were technically a stranger. 

Anyway, once you got here, you assumed that it had to be for a reason. You had been dumped in a world that you had spent years meticulously watching over and over again. You pretty much knew everything there was to know. So you had to be here for a reason, right? 

Well, after conferring with everyone and telling them you knew pretty much everything they had been experiencing since November 6, 1983, that idea got blurrier and blurrier. If you knew ‘everything’, then that meant that you had answers, right? Well, that’s exactly what everyone wanted: answers. But you had trouble providing them. It seemed like the only thing that you knew that they didn’t, was that Hopper was alive. You were hesitant to tell them this. 

Maybe you were supposed to, or maybe they were supposed to find out a different way and you weren’t even supposed to be there. The latter of these options seemed more viable as time went on. You began to question why you were there more and more everyday. You didn’t even know how you were supposed to help. You started to spiral.

Then came Steve, with his gentle touches, soft looks, and thoughtful actions. The idea of staying with Steve was a little scary at first, which he understood. He was nice about it, he tried to make you feel comfortable without crossing any boundaries. He let you take his bed, while he would take the couch or his parents bedroom. 

At first, you couldn’t even fall asleep. You were in another world, which came with interdimensional monsters, and you were staying in a place you had only seen glimpses of on TV. You were anxious and, frankly, a little scared. It especially didn’t help with all the lights off. But by the second or third day you got the courage to talk to Steve about it. Like the great guy he is, he offered to sleep on the floor of his bedroom so you wouldn’t be alone. You didn’t want him to have to sleep on the floor, but he didn’t really take no for an answer. 

Steve made a lot of nice gestures. He bought you things like clothes, or hair products, or any other basic toiletry items. (You know, seeing as how you didn’t exactly pack a suitcase before you got here.) He would talk to you, like, really talk to you. He would let you tag along when he hung out with Robin or Dustin. You would even hang out just the two of you. 

Over time, you two grew closer and closer. (Which eventually led to sharing his bed, seeing as how it made you feel even worse about him sleeping on the floor.) The more time you spent with Steve the more your feelings would grow. When he would do things for you or with you, it would always make you feel better. Although, after the high ended, your heart would ache. It would only remind you how much you cared about him. Remind you who he was, who you were, where you were. Everyday you became more aware of the fact that you were in over your head.

Now at this very ‘meeting’, it seemed as if you had reached your tipping point. It had become a bit more obvious that you were on edge. You were playing with your hair, picking at your fingernails, pretty much any basic tell that something was bothering you. For the first time in your life, you weren’t concerned whether or not anyone noticed. That’s how occupied you were by your thoughts and emotions. You had drifted off, which seemed to be something you did a lot lately. 

You didn’t know what you were thinking about more, Steve and your feelings for him or every worrisome thought about your being in this world. It was honestly killing you. You knew you needed to talk to someone about it, but who? What you were worried about had everything to do with the person that you were closest with, and sure, you had gotten somewhat close with a few of the others, but you just didn’t think you could dump all of this onto one of them. 

“Y/N,” the sound of Joyce’s voice drew you from your thoughts. From the looks on everyone’s faces you could tell that she had called your name a couple times before you had responded. “Are you okay, sweetheart?” she asked. They knew something was up. Your somewhat distant demeanor, your fidgeting, and now this oblivious, doe-eyed look on your face. It was obvious you hadn’t been paying attention.

You looked at them, your eyes traveling to each of theirs. Sometimes you felt so alone here, and when you looked at them, you could see the concern in their eyes, it touched you. It touched you in a way that made those feelings from before settle. At first they were a rumbling, chaotic ocean fighting to get through a dam. Now they are a calm, peaceful ocean gently lapping at the dam, waiting to be let through. All because they knew that when these people who you had watched fight for, care for, and protect one another looked at you as if they would or had done the same for you, you would break. 

You couldn’t feel it at first, but tears had started to slightly well up in your eyes. You only noticed when you did because everyone had either tensed up or slightly moved towards you. It was Steve who moved the most, even if it was only a foot or two. He inclined his head and his face was almost taken over by worry. He started to speak, “What’s going on, Y/N? Talk to us. Talk to me.”

When you were standing there, it almost felt as though you were in the middle of nowhere, despite having spent the majority of your time there. Everyone was surrounding you. Looking at you, watching you. You were holding things back, and it seemed as though they had finally realized, or at least decided to do something about it. So they were waiting. They were all confused and they all wanted answers, especially Steve. Whereas you, you were still afraid. 

You could feel the fear crawling up your back, with everyone’s eyes on you. But hitting your breaking point only made that fear feel like a tiny shiver or a small gust of wind. You knew they wanted answers, wanted to know what was wrong and there were so many things, so many big things, but hearing Steve’s voice and seeing the concerned look in his eyes brought out all those feelings regarding him. So you looked at him, somehow already feeling the tears begin to accumulate on your eyelids.

“Steve, I– I care about you so much.” You said to him, your expression soft but meaningful. On the inside it was like you were readying yourself for battle. “Being here, being with you, has been pretty much everything I’ve ever wanted, and yet I feel like I’m losing my mind.”

You can feel the emotions building up inside of you, preparing to flow out. When you look at Steve, he seems mostly calm and slightly empathetic to your dejected state, but you can still see the hint of confusion behind his eyes. You continue, trying your best to explain. 

“Steve I–” you stop yourself. You’ve felt this way for so long, but trying to explain it out loud to another person is somewhat difficult, and maybe even embarrassing. “God, there are so many things that are bothering me, that are eating me alive day by day, but one of the biggest ones is you. I care about you so much and I can’t stop. I can’t think about anything else. I. . . I’m sorry.” 

Unsurprisingly, your confession hasn’t diminished Steve’s confusion, he furrowed his eyebrows at you, shaking his head. “Why are you sorry?”

“Because this is crazy, Steve! This is absolutely crazy! I– This– This is–.” You knew you were stammering. You knew that what you were saying probably didn’t make any sense. At this point, you didn’t exactly know what you were referring to when you said ‘this is crazy’. As in, how you were feeling was crazy? Being, you know, in a world that you thought was just a TV show was crazy? Or maybe. . . you were just crazy? 

“Hey, hey, hey.” Steve said, walking toward you. He placed his hands on your shoulders, squeezing slightly and gently rubbing up and down. “It’s okay. It’s okay. Just tell me how you feel.”

You looked up at him, into his eyes. He was doing it again. He was looking at you, and talking to you, and touching you in a certain way, and. . . and that brought it all out. It was almost as if his gentle movements on the sides of your shoulders were coaxing out the words and emotions that you had been holding back. You knew everyone was looking and listening, but while they were looking at you, you were only looking at Steve. 

“I’ve watched you on a screen for so long. And I always wanted to be there for you. Be there with you. Like that night at Tina’s party,” your voice quieted at this next part. “When Nancy told you that she didn’t love you. I wanted to be there. I wanted to hold you and tell you that everything was going to be okay. And when Billy hurt you. When you were in his car and you were screaming your head off. I wanted to hold you and kiss all your cuts and bruises and make you feel okay. And when you were stuck in a secret, underground, Russian base, I wanted to be there,” You chuckled a little at this part. You wanted to be in one of the most dangerous places ever. You wanted to be almost face to face with death, just so you could be with Steve. 

“I wanted to be there with you. Steve, after all this time, after watching you change and grow and live, I got attached to you. I got so attached and I came to care so much about you. I know you weren’t real. And, God, that just made it hurt. Because I wanted to be there. I wanted what I was feeling to be real. I wanted you to feel the same. And now here I am. With you right in front of me. And every time I look at you, all those things that I felt, they come rushing back. And I can’t help it, Steve. I. . . I can’t help it. I’m sorry.” 

By now you had felt a few tears roll down your face. This was everything that you had ever wanted. You were pouring your heart out to Steve Harrington. . . and you were terrified. You wanted him to feel the same. So badly, you did. But what if he did feel the same, what then? You didn’t belong here. What would you do? What would he do? Your mind was racing with questions. Questions of what might happen, what Steve might say. Your mind was also racing with everything else bottled up inside of you. Everything else you were feeling. Whether it was feeling like you didn’t belong here, feeling useless because of your lack of knowledge, or feeling like a burden because it didn’t seem like you were helping anyone. 

“Y/N,” Steve began, feeling slightly overwhelmed by your confession. He liked you, he really liked you. 

<><><><>

When he first saw you at Family Video, asking you if you needed help with anything, he never would have thought that you weren’t from around here. He immediately noticed how pretty you were. You also really seemed to know your stuff about movies, which makes more sense now, seeing as how your world is set about 35 years into the future. What was really different about you than the other girls he talked to at Family video, was that you actually seemed pretty eager to talk to him and be around him. It was nice to not be the only one supporting the conversation. So eager in fact, that he actually ended up spending his break with you that day. 

After you revealed everything to him, and eventually the others, he was a little let down. He assumed that the only reason you wanted to hang out with him was so that you could get in contact with everyone else. It didn’t take you long to realize this, seeing as how you knew TV shows and you knew Steve Harrington. You didn’t hesitate to explain to him that that wasn’t true. That you actually did like him. This was one of the first things that made him like you as much as he did. 

Steve had never lived with anyone besides his parents. It was new, but with you it was easy. When you first got there, you were nervous and a little out of sorts. He tried his best to make you as comfortable as possible. So he gave you his bed and slept on the couch, (or maybe even his parents bed, but sometimes it just felt a little weird). And when you told him you were scared and couldn’t fall asleep, of course he offered to stay in his bedroom with you. He didn’t care that he would sleep on the floor, as long as you felt safe. 

He cared about you because, well, it seemed like you cared about him. You were sweet and kind and you liked him. You talked to him and made him feel happy. When he would ask you about the things you saw when you watched the show, and he would feel bad about the things that he had done in the past, you reassured him that that wasn’t who he was anymore. He was “thoughtful, and caring, and brave, and smart, and funny, and amazing”. He wasn’t that person anymore and you made him feel better about himself. You cared. 

He returned the favor by caring for you. By buying you clothes when he realized you only had one outfit, buying you hair products and body wash and other stuff like that, buying groceries that you liked, and cheering you up when you seemed upset. You two hung out all the time. Sometimes you would hang out with him and Dustin, or him and Robin, sometimes all four of you. 

You two had become so close and it was so nice. You two even ended up sharing his bed. You had felt worse about making him sleep on the floor as time went on, so you offered and he accepted. Of course you two left room between each other at night. (Every once in a while, one of you would wake up wrapped in the others arms or vice versa. They would then proceed to untangle themself, after savoring the moment for a few seconds, before the other awoke). 

He knew he liked you that first day he met you, but he never could have imagined how much he would come to like you. God, he had come to care about you so much. He was so glad the universe had dropped you in his world. And now here you were, in front of him, telling him everything that he wanted to hear. Apparently, you liked him just as much as he liked you, but, for some reason, you were sorry about it.

<><><><>

On the inside, Steve was elated to know that you felt the same way, but you seemed so sad and broken, and he didn’t know why. His hands were still placed on your shoulders, and he took one and used it to brush some of the hair out of your face, while his thumb brushed a tear from your cheek. His touch was soft and gentle. “Why are you sorry?” He knew it was probably the third time he had asked, but he had to know why you were sorry about feeling this way. 

Steve’s touch was really consoling, especially combined with the tender look in his eyes. It drew out everything you had been afraid to say. And you were already in the deep end, so why turn back now? 

“Because of the way that I feel about you. This situation is already complicated enough. I probably shouldn’t even be here, but I am. And I’m supposed to be helping everyone and I don’t think I can. To top it all off, I’m falling in love with you. You probably shouldn’t even know that I exist. I’m making everything ten times worse. It’s not just my feelings that are making everything worse, it’s me. So I’m sorry. I’m letting everyone down and I’m sorry.” Some of this sadness had started to turn into anger. Anger at yourself for being this way. Anger at the universe for bringing you here. 

“You’re not letting everyone down.” The sound of Robin’s voice caught you off guard, causing Steve’s hand to fall back to your shoulder. You had almost forgotten about everyone else. For a while, it felt like it was just you and Steve. 

Robin stepped closer to you two. Her gaze connecting with yours. “You’re, literally, in another universe. Your entire world has changed, of course you’re overwhelmed. You may not have all the answers, no one does, but that doesn’t mean you’re not trying. It doesn’t mean you’re not helping.” 

Robin was so kind to you. She had become such a great friend and sometimes she could make you feel better just as much as Steve could. You were happy that she was comforting you, but you couldn’t help the “what ifs” running through your head.

“But I’m supposed to have all the answers, aren’t I? I’ve been watching this show for years. I have the lines memorized. I know it like the back of my hand. Why would I be here If I shouldn’t know what was going on? I mean, why couldn’t I have been dropped in season two or season three or even season one? I don’t know how I’m supposed to help, maybe I’m not even supposed to be here, maybe this is just a mistake. Maybe I’m a mistake.” 

The tears had seemed to return now. Normally, you would be embarrassed to be crying in front of so many people, but right now it wasn’t hitting you like it normally would. 

“You’re not a mistake.” Your eyes focused back on Steve. “After spending so much time with you, I’ve realized how important you are. At least to me. So, yeah, maybe you’re not totally sure what you’re supposed to do here, but that doesn’t mean that you don’t have a purpose.” His hand moved back to rest on your cheek. “Come on, Y/N, you’re one of the smartest people I’ve ever met, I know you can figure it out. And if it’s hard, we’re all here for you. We can help you too, it doesn’t just have to be the other way around.” 

For the first time in a while, your eyes flickered to everyone else’s. You really kept forgetting that they were there. When you looked at them though, it seemed like they actually cared. You noticed the empathetic smiles that grew on most of their faces. 

“And,” Steve continued. “I think that you’re supposed to be here. I believe that.” At this next part, he shifted his gaze to the ground and his voice got a bit quieter. “Even if. . . it’s just to be with me.” 

Your eyebrows lifted when you heard him. You had never really thought about it that way. Maybe you weren’t necessarily here to help them, maybe you were just here to be with them. Maybe it was both. Hearing this come from Steve and seeing his shy demeanor when he said it, made your heart flutter a bit. He looked back up at you and moved his hand back to your cheek.

“I care about you, too. I’m so glad that the universe put you here. That it gave me you. Ever since I met you at Family Video, I knew that I wanted to be around you. I mean, for once, someone actually seemed interested in me. And after you told me that you actually meant it, I knew I was in for a ride. I don’t know when, maybe the day I met you, when you laughed with me instead of at me, or when you told me you were too afraid to sleep alone, or when you hung out with me, Dustin, and Robin, and it felt like you were supposed to be there, or maybe somewhere in between, but I started to feel it. The electricity.” You smiled at the reference. “I felt it Y/N. I felt it with you. And I don’t know if I could feel it again, want to feel it again, not with someone else. So, I believe that you’re supposed to be here. Even if it’s just to be with me.” 

His voice had started to break a little too. You had only (vaguely) seen Steve cry once: Halloween, 1984. But here he was standing in front of you, with his big, brown, teary eyes. He cared about you. Steve Harrington cared about you. Your heart was bursting in your chest. There were still a few questions that you wanted answered, but the fears that you felt before could never amount to what you felt for Steve. What he apparently felt for you too. 

You raised your hand to the back of his neck, feeling the soft tuft of hair there. Your faces started to inch closer together, and, yes, you knew that there were other people there, but you couldn’t wait. You couldn’t stop everything that had been leading up to this moment. 

Your lips connected. One of Steve’s hands grasped your waist, while the other remained on your cheek. One of your hands rested on his jaw, and the other found its way into his hair. His lips were soft against yours. Just as you thought they would be. 

Although you had thought about this moment countless times, you never could have imagined this. 

Your lips moved gently and slowly against each other’s, and the grips that you had on each other tightened. You wanted to be close to each other. You needed each other. You had seen each other everyday and you always missed the chance to hold each other this close. You wanted to make up for the lost time. You both didn’t realize how much you wanted this, how much you needed this, until you were doing it. 

Steve pulled away when he felt the wetness on his cheeks. You had started crying again. It was getting kind of embarrassing. After a moment, you both realized it wasn’t just from your tears. Steve was crying too. 

You were both so incredibly happy, but you were also scared. There were still so many questions left unanswered. But it was okay, because right now you have each other, and it’s really all that matters. 

He kissed you again, his arm winding around your waist. After you pulled apart, you wrapped your arms around each other, squeezing tightly. You buried your head in the crook of his neck. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry about everything.” You said to him. 

“You don’t have to be sorry, Y/N. You don’t have to be sorry about anything.” You held each other tightly, and after a moment you pulled apart. After the reverie faded, embarrassment took over, both of you remembering the audience you had around you. The blush on both of your faces intensified. 

Robin smiled. She knew you two liked each other. She saw you both all the time, of course she noticed. She knew this was coming, so she wasn’t all that surprised. But she was surprised about how troubled you seemed. She didn’t understand why you didn’t talk to her, why you didn’t talk to anyone. 

Dustin seemed to feel the same way. “Why didn’t you just talk to us?” You redirected your gaze back to everyone else, focusing on Dustin. You thought for a moment. 

“I was afraid. It was because of everything that I said. I didn’t want you guys to know that I didn’t know what I was doing. I didn’t want to let you down. I didn’t want you to realize that I couldn’t help. I didn’t. . .” as you spoke to Dustin, you started to think of things that you hadn’t before. You started to realize things that you hadn’t before, and your voice got quieter as you went on. “I didn’t want you guys to dump me. . . I didn’t want you to leave me behind. I didn’t want to lose you. Didn’t want to lose this.” 

Your gaze had shifted to the ground by now. You felt Steve’s fingers intertwine with yours, and you looked up at him. “You’ll never lose me.” He whispered. 

Dustin started to speak again. “Robin was right, Y/N. You’re not letting us down. As far as I’m concerned, nothing bad has happened yet. So if anyone needs help right now, it’s you. You’re the one stuck in another universe. It’s like Steve said, this doesn’t have to be a one way thing. And besides, it’s sort of nice having you here.” 

“He’s right.” Robin jumped in. “I’m glad that you’re here too. And I think, for once, the dingus is right.” She smiled at you and Steve, “I think you are supposed to be here. I mean, this can’t just be a coincidence. And just because you don’t know why, doesn’t mean it’s not true.” 

You started to rethink your definition of ‘everything you’ve ever wanted’. You thought of changing it to this. You had seen these people fight for and care for one another over and over again. So, maybe this was everything you’ve ever wanted: having them care about you the same way. 

You knew they were right. You had been so concerned with not coming off as useless, that you had tunnel vision. When you thought about your being here, all you could think of was how you were supposed to help, how you were supposed to change things. You never once stopped to think that maybe, you were just supposed to be here. That that was all that needed to happen, for you to be, not do. When the time came, you would be there. 

When a new character is introduced, they don’t drive the plot. The plot drives them. They don’t show up and everything just suddenly changes. It takes time. Things have to actually happen, and so far nothing has. So maybe they were right. Maybe you were supposed to be here. Maybe this was your prologue. Maybe you just had to wait. To find out what you should do, when you would go home, if you would go home, and that’s okay. As long as you had Steve and everyone else by your side, it wouldn’t be so hard. 

“They’re right.” Joyce spoke up again. “Every time something strange has happened in our lives, it’s all been connected. No matter how small it was, and this is pretty big. Maybe you’re confused about why you’re here. Maybe you’re not quite sure what to tell us, but we can help you figure it out, and when the time comes, you can help us, too.”

You smiled. You felt happy and relieved. You looked up at Steve and finally understood why he looked at you so tenderly sometimes. It was because he felt the same way that you did when you looked at him. He wrapped his arm around your shoulder, and you knew that you would be happy here, no matter how long you ended up staying. 

You looked around at everyone, smiling. They smiled back, it’s pretty nice to have someone join them in this adventure. Especially someone who knew the future. 

“Well,” Nancy said, crossing her arms. “I guess that just means that we have to wait. Wait until we have a lead. Then we can figure out what needs to be done.” That reminded you. Hopper. 

“Well, there is one thing that you guys don’t know.” Everyone turned to you as you looked up at them with a hesitant expression. “One thing that I haven’t told you, because I was afraid.” 

“What is it?” They asked in unison.

<><><><>


End file.
